Some pictures from the weekend

I've got to get to bed...but here's a few pictures from the weekend. We celebrated my grandma's birthday and my cousin's as well.

Child screening, weekend plans, getting old.

How was your week? Mine has been soooo busy. Tonight I went to a Silpada party at my aunt M's house. There are so many pretty things. I wanted to buy a ring that was so cute...it was in the $36 range. I had the order form and then I thought WTF am I doing? Here I am trying to save up enough money to buy some new clothes since I'm down to just 2 pairs of jeans and a couple work pants, not to mention I have almost no winter shirts. I can't afford jewelery! I promptly put the pen down and stepped over to the snack counter. Highlight of the evening? Popping a whole cube of brownie into my mouth, smearing it on my front teeth with my tongue and smiling at my sister and a family friend. LMAO.

My grandma has been in the hospital this week. She got out today finally. It was her birthday on Wednesday, so she missed that. My aunt is having a BBQ on Sunday so we can celebrate it though. I hope she stays well. I feel so bad for her. She's my last grandparent I have left and it sucks watching her get old and frail. It sucks worse for her of course. She's always been so active and lively..and spunky her whole life. And now her body is just not working right anymore. I don't want to get old like that. If I keep on being fat and not exercising, I guess I don't have to worry about that though. There's an upside to living like a pig - shortened life span. Oink.

Lil Bro has "early childhood screening" tomorrow (Friday). Whatever that is. I know what it is, but I think it's a big waste of time since he's like the smartest kid ever. He knows more than I do with somethings. Like the colors - in Spanish. Not just the basic ones either. Thank you, Dora. He knows all his letters and can write his name and uses his foam letters to spell many words. He recognizes words on signs when we're driving. He knows everything most 5 year olds know...except he's 3. So tomorrow should be a piece of cake. The forms you have to fill out. Sheesh.

We missed the moon festival last weekend. That was mostly my fault. The weather was icky and I knew at least part of the time was supposed to be outside...but mostly I just didn't feel like sitting in a crowd if it was all indoors. The girls wanted to use their gift cards and that just sounded better. I kind of wish I would have gone now, but I'll have to make it a point to go next year. I also didn't have my garage sale. I couldn't get everything ready in time. Better luck next year. Hahaha. I think I'll put some of my stuff up on Craig's list instead since I've just got a few big items. Maybe I'll try a consignment shop for some of my work clothes and a couple expensive jackets. I lack ambition lately.

Big weekend for the girls. There are some big events at the school tomorrow so they both are going there. Hollywood is spending the night with a friend and MK is having THREE girls over after the dance for a sleepover. That should be fun. I think we'll make do-it-yourself waffles for breakfast Saturday before they go home. They are all really nice girls that I feel comfortable with so that should be fun.

Saturday night S~ and I are staying overnight in a hotel. My awesome sister is staying with the kids. I could SO SO SO use a full night's sleep without getting up a couple times during the night. Plus, IT'S FREE - YAY! Sometimes it pays to have a compulsive gambler for a friend - free casino hotel rooms. Lil Bro still has trouble sleeping through the night. Some nights are good, most are not. Last night I let him sleep with me. He only woke me up once then - and it was so sweet. He had lost all his blankets and cried out, so I reached over to rub his back and pulled my warm covers up around him, and he said, "I love you mom". SO SWEET. I told him I love him too and off to sleep we both went again. That was worth getting woken up for. :)

Weekend recap

This weekend flew by as usual. I'm trying to remember what all we did. Friday S~ came over and we just hung out at home with the kids. We all had a nice time. Saturday I cleaned up outside - washed the windows on the front of the house where all the tree frogs have been sticking their tiny feet all summer and pooping giant turds. I got down all the spider webs and a wasp nest, then I mowed the grass - twice. My lawn mower had been out of commission for some time, so I mowed it once higher up and then again low. Looks much better out there now and not like an abandoned/foreclosed home.

Sunday I took the girls shopping for some more school clothes, courtesy of my Aunt Anne. :) She sent the girls gift cards so they were eager to use them. One of them I was able to combine with a 20% off coupon so MK did pretty good there. She got gorgeous 3 tops, some earrings, and some bracelets. Hollywood found 2 more pairs of jeans and 2 tops along with some fun stuff as well. We also enjoyed lunch/supper at my favorite place, Red Lobster. Lil Bro asked for and ate a bunch of fish and broccoli. Yay! Thank you, Aunt Anne!

After we got back from our shopping and dining trip we grabbed a comforter from home that a certain little someone had spilled an entire cup of orange koolaid on and headed for the laundromat. It doesn't fit in my machine.

Not my favorite place to go, but it's clean and it sure smelled good in there.

MK did her homework while we waited. She's such a good student.

It smelled good in there until this one lady showed up. Have you ever smelled meth smoke? Unfortunately I have - on a guy I used to work with. I never knew what the smell he always stunk like was until I took a drug, alcohol and tobacco class. They explained it and I knew right away that was what he smelled like. That lady smelled like it too - really strong. I posted on FB that either she was smoking it in her car with the windows up or was wearing "essence of cat piss" perfume. YUCK.

We got home and had some popcorn, watched some TV, and then I got the kids off to bed. Lil Bro watched Yo Gabba Gabba - he's into that lately. Only he calls it Oh Gabba Gabba. His big treat for the day was a Lightening McQueen Lego kit from the Cars 2 movie. He loves those. I'm sure he'll keep asking until he has the whole Cars 2 Legos collection. He has mater already and some other one. Hollywood helped him put it together at the laundromat. He was so good all day today. He doesn't really enjoy shopping much, but today he was awesome.

Here's his scary "smile" face. LOL He cracks me up so bad. He has such a cute smile...but when you ask him to smile for the camera he does this. Too funny.

Lil Bro has decided he wants to be a zebra for Halloween. Don't ask how that came up, I have no clue.

Lil Bro's got something new

Is it just me or do you kind of go temporarily blind after reading my blog? I see lines when I go from the dark background with white letters to the opposite. Maybe I should change it to something different. Thoughts?

Lil Bro had a good day today. He finished his antibiotic so he's done taking his "blue raspberry candy" as he calls the amoxicilin that I turned blue with food coloring because he wouldn't take it white. I don't know why it wasn't the usual kid-friendly pink color, but he thought for sure it was something vile when it was white.

He also finally got the one thing he has been waiting for - his Cars 2 blanket. I had decided to make him a blanket/quilt type thing a couple months ago. We went to the store and he picked out some fabric - with Cars 2 characters on it. I bought some batting to use too. That was when I was working 3 jobs...so it sat on my sewing cabinet since then. I'm down to 2 jobs now, so finally yesterday I started working on it. I have never made a blanket like that before and didn't have anything to follow, but how hard can it be? Not very, I think. I cut it and started pinning it yesterday. Lil Bro LOVES to point out each different car and either tell or ask what it's name is. 

Today I finished pinning it and sewed it all together. It was tough getting it back from him to take a picture. The color sucks on these pictures, but it's late and I'm too tired to fix it. Sorry.

He LOVES it. He was so excited. MK was at dance practice when I got it all done. He kept asking when she would be home so he could show her his "Cars blanket". It turned out like I had hoped. It's not too thick. It's nice and soft. He can cuddle up in it. Actually that is what he's doing right now. He's all wrapped up in bed in it. His baby comforters were getting too small - he often pulls the blanket up over his head and now when he does that, his feet stick out. :) 

Problem solved. I picked up another yard of fabric tonight (same stuff) to make a matching pillow case since I made the blanket extra long. I like making stuff. Saves money too!

Tomorrow is Friday. YAHOO! I'm supposed to be having a garage sale Saturday...I'm SOOO not ready. I took 1/2 day off tomorrow though, so hopefully I can pull it all together.

Preschool - a recipe (veggie pizza) - and a diet...again.

Lil Bro started Preschool on Monday. He brought home the cutest picture that he drew of the two of us today. I'm the one on the right. He's been writing his name really well too (which I removed from this pic). He's on the left. I have hair even.

He really doesn't notice that he started preschool since he just goes to a different classroom at his daycare. I know they do more stuff with him of course, and I know he's learning more now. He just thinks its more of the same at daycare - fun. :)

Yesterday I made veggie pizza. It was OH-SO-GOOD. The kids loved it. If you'd like the recipe, I'll post the link here. It's a way to get kids to eat veggies even if it's not exactly considered "healthy". LOL

I have my 20 year class reunion coming up Oct. 1st. Oh joy. I want to go and I am going...but I wish I wasn't so...lumpy. I'm going to try the 17 day diet. I did it once before...I only lasted 10 days...but I lost 9 pounds during that time. It's pretty strict and I struggle with will power but if I counted right it is 17 days from today until the reunion. So I'm doing it. MK is doing it with me and I'm trying to recruit my sister as well. Wish me luck - with the diet, not with recruiting my sister. I will need it.

Another ear problem...and what am I doing?

How can this guy get me to fall for him over and over again? 14 years and counting. Off and on, off and on. Hollywood is really happy her dad is coming over again. To me he seems somehow different this time. She's picked up on it too. He's far from perfect - he has some of the same old flaws - but he is more open and outgoing...and we've been able to talk about the issues from the past without having a blow out. Baby steps. Anyone can pretend for a few weeks. Look at the last guy I dated - a whole YEAR of pretend. I'd like something REAL this time.

Let's be honest - I don't know what the hell I'm doing. If my kids were against me letting him back in my (our) life, I would stuff it all down and stay away from him. But they're not. He's trying to right the wrongs. They were BIG wrongs. That's the thing about hurtful words - once they spill from your lips you can't take them back. There they are, all ugly and out in the open. He can't change what he said. But he's been so kind and told me how stupid it was for him to blow up and he did talk to MK and apologize. I think he feels genuinely sorry for acting like a jerk. MK has no reason to forgive him, but she doesn't mind him coming around as long as he keeps being so good to all of us. Time will tell.

Speaking of MK - she told me today that she needed to go to the Dr. She said her ears hurt and were plugged up. She has no other symptoms. We had been to the Ke$ha concert a few weeks ago and it started shortly after that. She didn't want to tell me, but she thought that she had permanently damaged her hearing or something. We went to urgent care tonight and they ended up cleaning her ears so they could see in them. She had a lot of wax in there - A LOT. It was hiding an infection too. So she's got ear drops and antibiotics now. And no hearing damage. From the looks of it, she had internal earplugs in at the concert. LOL and YUCK. She said she felt a lot better just from them cleaning them out. Poor girl. She's such a great student and she even brought her homework to the clinic to work on while we waited. Good thing too since we were gone almost 3 hours. I ♥ her.

A date and a wedding

Did I scare you with that title?

I'd have to say that this weekend was pretty great. I went on a date on Friday night with Hollywood's dad. A real date - where he took me to a nice restaurant and paid for our meal. Hey, after what I've been dealing with I don't take anything for granted. ;) We went to a place I had never heard of: SuiShin - a Japanese place with delicious sushi and everything else. I ate things I've never heard of before. Hollywood's dad (S.) got Sukiyaki - I liked his dish better than my own. The sushi was SOOO GOOD. It's in North Oaks if you're in MN.

The kids and my extended family and I went to a wedding dance on Saturday night for a family friend. It was beautiful - outdoors - and PERFECT weather for it. Little Bro loved it - especially the popping of the bubbles they had on the tables. 

Here is a picture of my sister, me, and my brother. He was the best man, but isn't he always? ;)

My niece - she's such a doll! She looks so grown up in this picture. Wow - time flies!

And here is one of my sweet little family. I am one lucky woman.

Little Bro even shook it a little bit while chasing bubbles. :)

On Sunday we went to visit my grandma in the nursing home. She asked me if she had missed some big catastrophe. I didn't know what she was talking about at first, but then she showed me the newspaper. She was reading about the anniversary of 09/11. I guess the part of her memory that stored that event has been affected by her memory loss. I went through the events of that day and told her the details I knew. It was strange telling her about it...like breaking the news to her. She is from Norway, so she at first compared it to the recent events that happened in Oslo, but I told her nearly 3,000 people had died. She seemed to realize then the magnitude of it. I'm sure my aunt had probably already told her the details earlier that day, but her short term memory didn't recall it. What a sad day that was 10 years ago. I still remember it like yesterday.

S. was over on Sunday too. Lil bro was in hog-heaven sitting on S's motorcycle. Last year he was afraid of it...this time he wouldn't get off. He asked a million questions, like what the screws were for around the gas cap. Then he asked me to go get my allen wrenches from my tool box so he could take it off. I'm in trouble when this little one gets bigger and starts dismantling things. LOL

Ear infections, self-hate, and ex's

Poor Lil Bro got sick after the fair. Not from the fair, but I could tell he was coming down with something the day before. He's normally happy-go-lucky all the time but he was not himself Sunday night. I brought him in to the doctor on Monday morning and he has an ear infection. He was running 102+ in fever Sunday evening through the night Monday night. But today was better.

He decided he doesn't like Amoxicilin. I think it is because it's not pink. For some reason we got a generic that isn't colored pink. He associates it with a medicine he doesn't like so I was fighting to get him to take it. I even called the pharmacy to talk to them about it. They told me I could put food coloring in it if it would help. I tried blue - told Lil Bro it was blue raspberry candy (on a spoon). I asked all the kids, "Who wants some blue raspberry candy!??" The girls played along and they all came running in. I gave it to Lil Bro first (and last - hahaha). He loved it. He told me how good it was and asked if he could have more. HA! He loved his bedtime dose too. Yay me!

Tomorrow everyone goes back to school and daycare. :(   The girls did so well taking care of Lil Bro this summer. I know he just loved staying home with them. I think he'll eat a lot better at daycare, but he sure loved sleeping in and playing at home all day. I found out we qualify for a scholarship for preschool. That starts soon too. Lil Bro's orientation for that is on Thursday. There's so much going on this week!

I've been feeling a little blue lately. Gee, can't imagine why. ;)  It hits me at odd times. Some days I can't quit thinking about my recent ex boyfriend - replaying things that we did together and things he said to me. It's hard to believe he lied to me about most things. I don't understand how or why some one would pretend they love you for a whole year. He didn't get that much out of me - love and laughter mostly. I never gave him money or anything like that. We have the same sense of humor (if he wasn't faking that too) so we loved the same movies and I laughed so hard sometimes at stuff he would come up with or at movies we watched together. He told me that he had never felt this close to anyone before - not even his ex who he was married to for over 20 years. He said I made him feel good about himself when she had always put him down and belittled him. He lied. He said he loved me, that he could see himself with me forever. I have to keep telling myself that he lied. I don't know where the truth stops and the lies begin. They are all intertwined. I feel mostly anger now. Mad at him, mad at myself for...I don't know. Mostly mad at him.

My low-self-esteem part of me feels like since he was so handsome (in my opinion) I should have known better than to think he would want me. I'm fat. I have stretch marks and a mushy belly. My thighs are yucky. I have an extra chin if I'm not extending my neck. I'm getting old. When I laugh my face looks weird and I can see where all my wrinkles will be when I'm an old lady. My hair is getting thinner. I have to use a depilatory on my upper lip. And I have one single dark hair that keeps growing back on my chin. I pluck it constantly. See? Who would want to put up with all that? That's why you're supposed to get married when you're young and....not mushy I guess. I think it is just hard to look at myself through his eyes after hearing things he said about me to others after we broke up. Hurtful things.

I went to a BBQ for my daughter's father's sister (Hollywood's dad's sister - we're close) shortly after the split with the liar. She's getting married to a really sweet guy and it was an engagement party. She is just the sweetest girl ever and he is really great too. Hollywood's dad was there. Why is it that he's always there to swoop in when I'm feeling low? He knows I'm single again. He talked to me most of the time I was there. He even pulled MK aside and said he was sorry to her for the things he said way-back-when (when I put him on the greyhound bus during family vacation in SD). He was sweet to Hollywood and didn't smother Lil Bro. He acted like he should - like he should have been doing all along when we were together. Hollywood said she was happy that he was so nice to her. Ya, it should have been that way all along.

I've been talking to him here and there since the BBQ. He tells me how beautiful I am, how much he still cares for me, how he is sorry for his stupid behavior back then (first time he admitted what he did was wrong), that he wants another chance to be in our lives and to show me he has changed. He explained his "logic" back then - and why he was so unhappy leading up to the trip. It's been a real eye opener. I think sometimes the worlds we came from are just too far apart. He's Vietnamese and was raised in a culture that is very, very different than mine when it comes to views and attitudes about many things. That was part of the wedge between us before. He has a hard time communicating feelings (like many men do) but the feelings are there even if he didn't talk about them. Instead, it built up until it became a big ball of resentment, feeling overlooked, powerless and unappreciated. I have a strong personality and strong opinions about things I believe in. I see black and white when sometimes it isn't that simple. I'm used to being in charge and for a man from his background, that's a hard pill to swallow.

For now, the attention is a boost for me. It helps offset all the self-hate I felt after seeing myself the way the liar said he saw me. But they always say what they have to say to get back in...and then go back to the old ways. Sometimes I wish I could let him back in...wish I believed that he changed. But they don't change. And they lie.

After reading this...I sound like a big whiner who hates things about myself but doesn't do anything about them. I like me. I just need to improve me. Not for a man, but for myself. I like who I am on the inside, and that matters most. I need to find the will power to make the lifestyle changes that I need to make. And that is a hard thing to do.

The Fair

We like to take pictures of all the food we try...so a lot of our photos are of FOOD. Enjoy.

http://www.flickr.com//photos/sowhatwhocaresblog/show/

It's exhausting being a kid sometimes

I posted this on Facebook too, but not all my relatives are on FB - this was taken after a long hard day of swimming, eating Ba's homemade eggrolls, and sipping DQ Slushies. He fell asleep still holding his eggroll.

Getting Ready....For the Fair

I don't have a stroller for Lil Bro. I had a stroller for him last year but over the winter our garage became infested with mice and they made a home in it. It was DISGUSTING. He never sat in it anyway and it didn't come apart to wash the parts of it so I tossed it. I picked up a different one just for tomorrow. He decided he LOVES it now and won't get out of it. Hollywood has been pushing him around the house in it since we got home. He helped put the wheels on, so he's extra proud of it.

His other GIANT happy thing today was this purchase:

He has always wanted a pair of "light up" shoes. These not only light up, but they have his favorite character Lightening McQueen on them. Now I'll have someplace to put my camera for tomorrow (in the basket under the stroller). We're all so excited to go. The whole family is going...my mom, dad, brother, SIL, niece and sister.

Labor Day Weekend

The summer is almost over. *dislike* The girls go back to school, my son goes back to daycare full time, and I have to get back into a routine that doesn't allow for hitting the snooze button repeatedly if I'm tired. We'll all live. I'm excited for them - school is an adventure. Mary Katherine LOVES school and she got most of the classes she requested. She does SO well in school and is really taking her high school career seriously, academically speaking.

Hollywood (formerly known as Peanut) is also excited, but nervous too since this will be her first year in middle school. She'll do great. Props to my aunt M. who took her to the orientation for me since they scheduled it the same night as the Ke$ha concert that Mary Katherine, my sister, and I went to. Hollywood wants to get her highlights touched up before school starts, so tomorrow is looking like the day we might do that. Mary Katherine wants to get some red streaks in the underside of her hair too...I think I'll let her. You're only young once! I don't really have the money for it, but they took care of Lil Bro all summer and I owe them.

I'm a little irritated with daycare. They operate a preschool in the same building as my son's daycare. When my girls were little, if it was a home daycare or a center, they always did a preschool curriculum regardless. My daycare wants me to pay $100 per month for 3 partial days a week of instruction or $75 for 2 days. Um, hello? Am I not already paying you ~ $700 per month for him to be at your center anyway???? I asked if it was mandatory (since I'm barely scraping by the way it is). She said no, but said they *strongly encourage* it. Then she asked if it was the financial aspect of it that made me not want him to go. I said that it was the only reason I didn't want him to. She said she would check into getting a scholarship for him. That was nice of her. I still don't really get why I would have pay extra when I'm already paying them to take care of him though.

Lil Bro is most likely going to be attending his very first State Fair this weekend. I'm going to drag my camera along where ever we go so check back for pictures!! :)